Jon Corzine’s Steve Martin Imitation

Jon Corzine used the Steve Martin defense in his testimony before a House committee; here is the actual real transcript of his testimony:

Steve Martin: Ethicist

You can steal a billion dollars and never go to jail! You can steal a billion dollars and never go to jail! You say, “Jon, how can I steal a billion dollars, and never go to jail?” First, steal a billion dollars. Now you say, “Jon, what do I say to the SEC man when he comes to my door and says, ‘You.. stole a billion dollars’?” Two simple words. Two simple words in the English language: “I forgot!” How many times do we let ourselves get into terrible situations because we don’t say “I forgot”? Let’s say you’re on trial for armed robbery. You say to the judge, “I forgot armed robbery was illegal.” Let’s suppose he says back to you, “You have committed a foul crime. you have stolen hundreds and thousands of dollars from people at random, and you say, ‘I forgot’?” Two simple words: Excuuuuuse me!!”

A trusted democrat: Jon Corzine, former governor of New Jersey

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